Happy Saturday and Howdy folks!
I’m posting live from the Chicago area where I’ve just undergone my third Stellate Ganglion Block for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. My first experience with Dr. Lipov’s “Chicago Block” was in February 2011 and it changed…most likely even saved…my life. At the time I was having off the charts symptoms the likes of which I’d never seen. The first and second blocks took those symptoms down to nothing but slowly, over time, with the added traumas of Jen’s Dad’s death and my stepmom’s death, I saw some of those symptoms returning. They were nothing at all like the ones that first brought me here, but they were significant enough that once again, about ten minutes after the procedure, I felt a sense of calm flooding me as the anxiety drained out of my body and the muttering in my head became quiet. When I woke up this morning, it was starkly noticeable how quiet my inner landscape had become. I described it as if the circus that had been trying to set up there was suddenly gone. So yay science!
But that of course is not REALLY what I wanted to talk about today. No, I have bigger news than that.
About ten days ago, I gave notice at my dayjob and as of next Friday, I will be a full time writer.
Now, for the longest time I’d let go of this goal. I’d self-relegated myself to the ranks of short story writers with dayjobs with the notion that I would not ever likely make a living at this writing thing. The last time I seriously considered it was back in 1998 or so. But once the books started coming out both here and abroad, it suddenly came back onto the radar as a possibility. And you may remember that earlier this year, I talked about a plan for going full time within the next two years. Well, surprise, surprise, surprise…it happened sooner.
So what does this mean?
Well, first and foremost, it means bringing more balance back into my life. More time alone, in solitude, working at home in the Den of Ken without anyone around but Jake the Wonder Lab and my two shiftless cats, Annie Hall and Cujo. (Fortunately, Jake is the only energy draining extrovert in that mix.) Until now, I’ve been carrying a four-day-per-week dayjob that constituted two hours per day of driving (and about $60 per week in gas) on top of the work day…and a seven-day-per-week writing job that was sometimes running up to 40 hours of work. While raising three year old twins and taking care of the important relationships in my life. That’s a lot. Now, I’ll have more time to stretch out and get things done without all the high pressure and exhaustion.
It also means that I have enough breathing space to plan my work and work off of a production calendar that will give me my day-to-day, week-by-week, month-to-month writing assignments.
And I get to be the family cook Monday through Thursday, which I’m kinda excited about…and take on more around the house. Jen of course is over the moon about this. And I’ll have some dedicated Daddy-Daughters Time in the late afternoons and evenings now that I don’t have to come home, gobble dinner and go hide out with my words and my sense of never having enough time.
So all in all, this is a win-win-win for me and my family.
I’ll be blogging a bit more about this transition as it happens and as I learn exactly what it means.
Meanwhile, I’m struck by the notion once again that when we come to this writing thing, we often see the next turn of the corner as some kind of finish line, a place of arrival and accomplishment. But in all truth, they are just what they are — a turn in the corner, with a whole new stretch of highway to rush madly down in our marathon.
What’s the thing ahead of you that you see as a finish line? And what, do you imagine, might lay beyond it for you?
Trailer Boy out!